Broken Shell Pieces

One of my favorite things to do at the beach is go on a long walk, preferably alone with just the sound of the waves and the birds to keep me company.  Though I do like to go on talking walks too...with family or friends.  But the peaceful solitude of beach walks is always a good time for me just to think and pray and soak in nature (and some rays--great way to get a tan without just laying there!).  It truly is a time to listen and let God speak to me through His Spirit inside and His creation outside.

One of the most memorable walks I have had is the summer we were at the beach after Tag's silent birth.  God showed me a lesson I will never forget.  Here are the words from my journal:

I was standing there looking at a lot of shells—mostly broken & small ones—and seaweed.  As I was looking I heard from God that He made each of those shells for a purpose—each contained a small life that served a purpose.  WOW!

So this is the shell I picked up from that ugly mess--hundreds of shells left empty by the animals that occupied them and were long gone.  Most of the shells were broken.  Some were just mere pieces, their type of shell not even recognizable.

Of all the lessons one could draw from this messy pile, the still small Voice of God chose to assure me that each piece was represented a life of a tiny animal that had a purpose, just as the tiny life of Tag sure had a magnificent purpose in the grand scheme of things.  That is so true and was one of the hopes I clung to through the years of grieving.

There are many things you could use this metaphor for in life...but that is what God showed me then.

While that was my lesson then, I think my lesson now is to know that while the shell is broken into pieces, it is still a shell.  Who we are even in the midst of brokenness doesn't change.  Our heart is still our heart.  I recently re-read some of my journals from high school.  Over and over I prayed for guidance and truly sought the Lord for His will.  Through it all my heart's desire was to bring glory to Him in all I did.  That is still my true heart's desire.  Though my struggles have shadowed that desire, it is still the central desire of my heart.  Life throws curve ball sometimes, but God is never changing and to that truth I must cling.  We must cling.  He is so faithful!!